Laurel Luehmann

life

On Seasons

September 7, 2020September 7, 2020by Laurel LuehmannLeave a Comment

Don’t you just love this time of year? The weather is cooling down, the flies’ days are numbered (hooray!!!) and I’m loving my sweatshirts, hot coffee, and afghans.

The seasons are changing, and I’m so looking forward to fall.

Spend enough time around me and you’ll learn that it’s my tendency to look forward to things – always planning and dreaming and scheming, picturing where I’ll be next year, in two years, in five years, in ten years…

But that means I can get so caught up in my dreams that I’m tripping over the important things I dreamed about yesterday. That’s a problem.

However, in my mid-teens I was encouraged by several sources – books, a blog, friends – to embrace the season of life I was in at that moment, rather than always dreaming, always planning, always waiting for what was around the corner.

And so I did. While still making my lists and dreaming my dreams, I wholeheartedly embraced a season that brimmed with family, schoolwork, cooking, music, writing, and spunky calves. I threw myself into the thick of it and loved it.

And then I looked up. I was turning eighteen and graduating. The season in which I had learned to delight was deteriorating before my eyes.

My first response? “NOOOOO!!!!!!!”

Seriously. I went into mourning for about a week.

My beautiful life was about to be changed… forever. I would never get back those days of being a crazy little farm kid, of doing school around the dining room table with my mom and siblings, of having the relatively simple and easy life of a child. Never.

(Whaaaaaaahhhhhh…)

What was happening to my life? I liked it just the way it was… why did I have to grow up and graduate, ruining and complicating everything? Couldn’t life just stay the same? Nice and normal and… safe?

I knew that if I was kicking and screaming (figuratively!) on my way to high school graduation, something was seriously wrong with me.

My mindset had become flawed.

Gradually, unwittingly, I had allowed my season of life to occupy a place in my heart that was never meant for anyone or anything but God. I had let it become my delight, my satisfaction and my identity, when only God can truly be those things for me.

This summer God’s been teaching me to embrace, not my seasons, but Him, the never-changing Creator of my seasons.

He’s been instructing me to work heartily at the projects the day lays before me, but to shift gears quickly if need be.

He’s been reminding me to appreciate the abundance of blessings He daily showers on me, but to allow them to turn my eyes to Him, not away from Him.

He’s been revealing to me the glorious truth that with Him, each and every day is brimming with opportunities for growth, productivity, and joy… lots of incredible joy.

He’s been encouraging me to to make Him the very center of my life – in the midst of every crazy, beautiful season and all it contains.

I want to encourage you to center your life around this incredible God.

You will not regret it.

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When Life Doesn’t Make Sense

September 3, 2020by Laurel Luehmann8 Comments

If you’re a human, you go through seasons in which you simply can’t understand why your life looks the way it does… why so-and-so said such-and-such… why such-and-such had to happen/not happen… why your life is so obviously falling apart, and will absolutely never be whole again. *sighs and sniffs dramatically*

These seasons may be a nearly everyday occurrence for some. They’re few and far between for the rest, but they’re still there. And hard. Really hard.

I think God wisely planted inside of us something that tells us that life is supposed to make sense… and so we get frustrated when life doesn’t make sense. We cry when life takes an unexpected – and completely undesired – turn. We weep as our most beautiful dreams rot and crumble before our eyes.

Because we can’t see what the Author sees.

I’ve not yet read the book, but I do enjoy the movie based on Charles Dickens’ Bleak House. It’s rather gloomy and sad, but the writer’s heart in me rejoices at the incredible intricacies of the plot.

At the beginning, it seems like there are just a lot of loose ends – several stories that don’t relate to each other very well. There are times when what’s happening is so confusing and incoherent. But as the story progresses, you see how every single person, place, and event is linked together in one massive, fascinating plot. In the end, you are left in awe of the creator of such an incredible story.

See, the thing about stories is that they don’t make complete sense – they aren’t supposed to make complete sense – to anyone but the author until the end.

We’re in the middle of our stories right now, and so naturally there are a few aspects of them that leave us scratching our heads in confusion… or, if I may be frank and a bit more honest, bawling on the floor in complete emotional disarray.

But God’s perfect plot is still there. When it seems like everything is falling apart, it’s really falling into place. Truly.

I haven’t lived that long, but already I’ve seen God weaving my story together, and believe me, He beats Charles Dickens hands down.

I have seen Him take circumstances that I despised and use them to draw me to Himself.

I have rejoiced at the way He laid the groundwork for my prayers to be answered before I even thought to pray them.

I have cried as He allowed my dreams to be smashed, and tearfully trusted Him to build and fulfil better ones.

I have seen that, through it all, He has been faithful, and that He will be faithful for the rest of my days. Oh, it will be a glorious day when He reveals to me the entire script of my life, with all the “loose” ends tied together.

If you are His child, He will do the same for you.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose. – Romans 8:28 (emphases mine)

Be comforted… it will be worth it all when we see the end. ❤

Poetry

Once Again – A Poem

September 1, 2020by Laurel Luehmann6 Comments

Two natures fight within me

Clawing for complete control

And the evil one is winning –

Its dark reign I can’t o’erthrow.

For its grasp about my mind

Has left an imprint stiff as stone

And its chains about my heart

Into my flesh o’er time have grown.

And I can’t break from these shackles

That hold all my habits tight

For the rust of time has locked them

And I cry into the night

As I see the one You crafted

To be swift and strong for You

Melted to the mess I am –

How could my heart be so untrue?

Yet the dawn is breaking now

And in the early morning rays

I see the promise of the future

And new mercies with new days

And I see the power of Calvary

Making chains and shackles null

As Your faithfulness transforms me

And my shell falls, dead and dull

As new life is pulsing through me –

Though I’ve stumbled and I’ve failed,

Still You tell me that renewal

Is one humble step away.

Photo by Federico Respini on Unsplash

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Why I’m Glad to be a Farm Girl

August 27, 2020August 27, 2020by Laurel LuehmannLeave a Comment

Let me start out by saying that life in a dairy farming family is not a piece of cake. We have struggles and hard days… just like everyone else. But here are some random thoughts on why I love this life.

I get to live and work with my family – my best friends. To me, it doesn’t get much better than that! We have shared so many experiences together – fun and not so fun – and those are bonding. Working as a family draws us together, and I so love that.

I have always loved exploring and wandering through the pasture and woods. I know that many people don’t have the space to roam and spend time alone in nature, and I am so grateful to have that.

Farming builds character. Throwing haybales? Builds character. Picking rock? Builds character. Getting your hands covered in nastiness? Builds character. Have I made my point?

I think there’s something so wonderful about taking care of baby calves… then seeing them calve and join the herd in a couple of years.

I’m so thankful for the emphasis my parents and grandparents put on people. Running a farm takes much of their time and energy, but they are good at making sure that people aren’t lost in the shuffle. They make the time to be with family and friends, even when it’s difficult. This is an example I want to follow for the rest of my life.

I’ve learned that in this life there will be hard times, no matter what… it’s how you deal with them that matters.

This was originally published on my other blog, The Farmer’s Daughter.

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You May Be a Writer If…

August 24, 2020August 24, 2020by Laurel Luehmann12 Comments

…your brain is always churning with story ideas, song lyrics, or rhyming phrases.

…a favorite pastime is reading obituaries and wandering through graveyards. (You’d be surprised at how many writing prompts they hold.)

…you scribble random notes all over the place – on church bulletins, note cards, scrap paper, journal covers, napkins – so you won’t forget a brilliant idea that just *might* make a bestseller someday.

…your little sister sits on your lap at work. (happening right now, folks.)

…immediately after getting home from a family get-together you make a run for your journal, not wanting to forget any of the bizarre family stories that would be perfect in a book someday.

…you work two jobs at once – your brain is plugging away at your current story/poem while you’re feeding the cows.

…when you’re alone, you start a conversation between two imaginary people. Out loud. No idea who they are… their identities emerge as the conversation progresses. Oh, and it always helps if they have British accents and are in extreme emotional turmoil.

…it’s hard for you to throw any papers away. (Maybe someday I’ll come back to that story…)

…you sit bolt upright and grab for your phone when you wake up in the middle of the night so you can record a phrase that you heard in your dream and don’t want to forget.

Okay… writers are just weird. At least this one is. Can anyone else sympathize???

Journaling

The Journals That Changed My Life

August 20, 2020by Laurel Luehmann5 Comments

Every person in our lives influences us – whether it is an influence we recognize or not. Some people have a small influence, some people have a strong influence, and some people shake our lives forever.

For me, that was Jim Elliot.

I met him the year I turned sixteen. I spent a lot of time with him that year. He made me laugh, he challenged the way that I spent my time, and he lived his life in a way that made me want to live differently. He was strong in his faith, bold in his declaration of it, and passionately in love with Christ. He inspired me.

Wait, I forgot to tell you – he died over 40 years before I was born.

Shortly after Jim Elliot’s death at the hands of the men he was trying to reach with the gospel, his wife Elisabeth wrote Shadow of the Almighty. In this beautifully written biography, Elisabeth included excerpts of many of her husband’s letters and journals. Shadow of the Almighty had a profound impact on me.

What hit me most about the legacy Jim Elliot left in his writings was not so much the writing itself, but the heart, life, and dreams behind it. Don’t get me wrong – he had a rich vocabulary and a gift for powerful expression and humorous description – but that wasn’t all.

When you read his journals, you see a heart laid wide open before the Lord. He wasn’t afraid to proclaim the gospel and its implications. He didn’t shrink from confronting his peers about the condition of their souls.

Yet neither did he shrink from admitting his own faults and weaknesses. Some excerpts from the journals – “Oh, that I were not so empty-handed… I don’t love, I don’t feel, I don’t understand, I can only believe.” “Difficulty in getting anything at all from the Word. No fervency in prayer.” “Deep sense of uselessness this morning.”

Wait, what??? I’m not the only one who feels like this at times? Even the strongest and most passionate of Christians struggle?

Yes.

When I journal, I sometimes shrink from recording my struggles. I don’t always want to be honest with myself on paper. I start sweating when I think about the possibility of people cracking open my journal some day and getting a taste of 100% pure, raw, unfiltered Laurel. It’s scary.

But in reality, it’s not about me.

It’s about making myself available to God so He can display His power and goodness in me. If honesty in my journal entries may one day accomplish this by strengthening and encouraging others, I’ll swallow my pride and make myself available to God.

‘Cause that’s my purpose.

Have you made it yours?

Journaling

Why I Journal

August 17, 2020August 17, 2020by Laurel Luehmann2 Comments

I received my first journal at the tender age of eight… and I’ve been journaling more or less consistently ever since.

It’s become a habit I never want to break.

Let me tell you why.

First of all, spilling my thoughts onto a page helps me to think more clearly. Something about seeing the crazy mess inside my brain laid out in scrawling, tangible words helps me to see things a bit more clearly. It enables me to describe my circumstances, ponderings, and emotions in a way that makes me see the beauty in the pain, the humor in the frustration, and the purpose in the chaos.

Think of it as spring cleaning for the brain.

Second, it’s amazing to look back on over a decade of my journals and remember the hilarious stories, the frustrations and difficulties, and all the precious memories I might have forgotten. Especially as a writer, all of those bizarre family stories will come in handy someday as story inspiration!

Most of all, however, I love to be reminded through those journals of how God has worked in my life. What He has taught me. How He has grown me. How He has proved Himself powerful, wise, and faithful. And good. Always good. It’s my prayer that one day I’ll be able to pass my journals on to my children and grandchildren as a tribute to His goodness in loving and daily transforming someone as flawed and imperfect as me.

Do you keep a journal? What do you love about journaling?

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A Dream Coming True

August 13, 2020August 12, 2020by Laurel Luehmann11 Comments

Hello, readers!

I can’t tell you just how excited I am to be launching my author’s website. I’ve been spilling ink for years, and it’s almost surreal to be taking this step – officially presenting my writing to the world.

Here you will find a hodge-podge of things – ’cause that’s just me. As of right now, I am interested in many different aspects of writing, and so will be dabbling in a multitude of styles and topics here for awhile – perhaps forever. Who knows? Keep an eye out for poetry, short stories, thought-provoking and inspirational articles, and maybe even some updates on my progress on larger literary projects.

Being a book lover, I will also be posting book reviews and recommendations. There are so many good books out there that will warm your heart, challenge your mind, and change your life… but they can be hard to find. I’d love to share my discoveries with you.

I’m also going to be encouraging any aspiring writers on here… I’m cheering for you! This world needs good authors who are willing to stand up to this world’s problems and use their pen to aid in conquering them for Christ.

I’ll also have some reflective posts, pondering the beautiful and the bizarre of life.

I hope you’ll be patient and stick with me… this will be an awesome journey!

-Laurel

P.S. What would you like to see on here? What do you feel the world needs most from Christian authors?

Photo by Da Kraplak on Unsplash