Reluctant Hero – Installment #2

Last Thursday I shared a little piece of flash fiction (you can read it here). I got a couple of suggestions that it could be a series… and since I enjoyed writing the story so much, I decided to write a second installment!

If you’d like to hear more about poor Ryan and his trials and tribulations, let me know, and maybe you will.:)

***

ā€œGuys, this is Ryan. He’s gonna babysit you while Mommy is gone. Ryan, this is Holly, Cameron, and Jake.ā€

I try not to show my terror as I sweep a brief glance across the three little faces. ā€œHey, guys.ā€

ā€œHi, Ryan! Wanna wrestle?ā€ Cameron screams. Holly stares at me blankly. Jake takes one look at me and bursts into tears. Oh, to be young enough to show my true feelings.

ā€œI’ll be gone for about two and a half hours… that’ll work with your schedule?ā€ The mother of the little brutes speaks in the tone of voice I imagine a prison guard uses when pleading for time off. I decide against asking if two and a half hours will work with my mental health, and instead say, ā€œUh… yeah.ā€

ā€œPerfect.ā€ Her sigh of relief is enormous. ā€œThanks so much for doing this. Bye, guys! You be good for Ryan. Oh,ā€ she says, turning back with her hand on the front door knob, ā€œSupper’s on the table. Have fun!ā€

Because that’s what you say to a kamikaze pilot.

The door slams behind her with a dismal finality. I turn slowly, muttering prayers for deliverance under my breath, and force myself to make eye contact with my charges. ā€œSo… you guys hungry?ā€

ā€œI don’t like the crusts,ā€ Cameron yells, racing Holly to the table. Jake stares up at me from where he sits on a blanket on the floor, eyes teary and lower lip trembling. Seeing that he isn’t seeking food with the vicious enthusiasm his siblings express, I guess he’s not old enough to walk yet. Honestly, I wouldn’t be able to walk if my legs were that chubby, either.

So how does one go about picking up a baby? I stare quizzically at the mini monster. I consider calling my sister, but laugh at myself after a few minutes of consideration. What am I thinking? I can do this! You probably just… grab him. Under the armpits, maybe?

Holding him at arm’s length, I begin to question the wisdom of this method. He’s starting to cry again. Food will help. I rush him to the table and plunk him in the small chair that sits up higher than the others. I assume it’s some sort of baby container – it has restraining straps and everything. Oh, thank goodness. I don’t have to hold the thing on my lap and have him dribble applesauce and drool all over my arms.

 However, the kid lets out a primal yell when his chubby leg gets pinched in one of the buckles.

ā€œQuiet, Jake! QUIET!ā€ his siblings scream in unison, banging their spoons on the table. I try to take deep breaths. It’s gonna be a long night.

9 thoughts on “Reluctant Hero – Installment #2

  1. I enjoyed the first few paragraphs so much that I started reading it to my mom and brothers, and they loved it!! Please PLEEEEEASE keep writing these!! They’re hilarious! (And in a very well-written kind of way, I might add.šŸ˜‰)

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  2. I was laughing so hard at the depictions of Ryan attempting to pick up the baby and feed him. Thank you for keeping these up. I can’t wait to hear the rest of “Reluctant Hero” and the adventures of poor Ryan. šŸ™‚

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